1999 Football Pool Weekly Update

Week Five

"ouch." --Chris Hull (R.I.P.)

That was the main sentiment this week. Ouch, indeed.

"Wendy (Crowley) has that gleam in her eye. No losses, week five and she's starting to ask questions like 'What happens if more than one person goes into the playoffs with no losses?' Rookie." --Michelle Allan

Yes, Wendy's worries seem a little premature in the cold light of Monday morning. 118 contestants took a hit this Sunday. That's 88% of the picks. Nearly 9 out of every 10. How could that happen? Well, if you're curious, these are the totals of losing picks for each team...
Dallas 53
Minnesota 36
Oakland 13
New Orleans 7
Cleveland 5
Detroit 4
I guess all I'm saying is, 'You're not alone.'

"If they win, I'm a genius. If they don't...well, I lose. But I'm thinking Cincinnati is going to beat Cleveland. Never has so much ridden on such a bad team. But that's me. I'm 'risk' guy." --Brian McCabe

Brian and the other geniuses found solace in Buffalo, Green Bay, and Jacksonville, plus fabulous Tennessee and the miserable Cincinnati Bengals, one point away from being the worst team in football. But we all know it's a fine line between genius and insanity.

"This is not a stupid pick. This is not a stupid pick. This is not a stupid pick. This is not a stupid pick. This is not a stupid pick. This is not a stupid pick. This is not a stupid pick. This is not a stupid pick. This is not a stupid pick. This is not a stupid pick. This is not a stupid pick. This is not a stupid pick. This is not a stupid pick. --Cleveland." --Robert Spina

Hmmmm... stupid pick. Going against the anti-Cleveland movement was all the rage this week. But while it seemed to make sense not to take a chance on the Cleveland game, it was surprising to see people actually PICKING CLEVELAND? God bless the dreamers. And on the flip side, once people started accepting the frailness of Denver, actually picking against the defending CHAMPIONS, the Broncos came to life and added to the week's carnage. There's that fine line again.

"After this weekend, we are... The House of the Spinning Skulls!" --Patty and Vince Cook

Spinning skulls are everywhere. The flames of hell have claimed some victims this week, too. We say good-bye to some old friends, friends we've known for five weeks now... Ergener, Gamble, Hamley, Hull, Lozano, J.P. Manoux, Quast, Ross, Schuelke, Schwing, Jen Stein, Tabata, Tinley, Vallely, and Josh Vaughan. Next year, kids. Next year.

The standings are as follows...
No losses -- 3 Intelligentsia (Ellen Ducey, Mag Dickshot, Mindy Miller)
One loss -- 52 Smarty Pants
Two losses -- 64 Special Ed
Deceased -- 21 Flunkies

"I'm picking Dallas, cause I like that J.R." --Greg Rice

Week Six picks are due this Saturday at dawn. I got a feeling there's going to be a whole lot of Jacksonville going on. When Cleveland comes to town, it's time to celebrate. Beware the big upset, though. Every once in a while, the underdog has his day. And the big boys go down hard.

"America's team, my ass." --Jeremy Shamos

Well put.

ducey


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