July 15, 1998
Now while Gilda Stratton may have remembered me as a talented young up-and-comer, Sally Stiner's last words about me to my agent were that I was "paralyzed and not funny." Still, I was called in to read for the new role on this show because of the ABC deal. Also in my favor, Kevin Abbott, the writer and executive producer on The Hanleys, was now writing for this show and he and I had a very good relationship before. So the forces of good and evil were at full strength for this battle, and the dark side may have prevailed.
Now, I don't like to sit back and point fingers because I obviously should be trying to improve myself instead of simply casting blame, but since this is the second big audition that I've tanked with these casting people, I have to vent somewhere. The problem today was that the reader's reading of the scene was too quick and void of emotion. Granted, I have read with other people who were a lot worse. And I'm not saying that she intentionally ambushed me or anything, but there was just enough missing that the timing of the scene was way off. The result? I blanked on the third line in the scene, a punchline, mind you, and had to pause and look down at my script to get it. By the time I had delivered it, my name had been mentally scratched off of every list in the room.
So what do I do to fix the situation? Obviously I could have benefitted from a slightly different approach when preparing the scene. Maybe my process of recording the lines to help me learn them is weakening my ability to adapt to different readers. Maybe I could do a few versions of it, or re-record the version I am using about half way through the memorization process. Open-minded and flexible. Must maintain the ability to adapt. OK, bring it on.