Audition report--

The good news? Movie-of-the-Week audition.

The bad news? It's a run-of-the-mill behind-the-scenes movie.

The good news? It's about Three's Company.

The bad news? I would play John Ritter.

Not that playing John Ritter would be bad. Re-creating a boyhood hero in his shining moment would be great fun. It's trying to convince someone that I should play John Ritter that's going to be so hard. With my hair at a full 1/2-inch, I can't really throw together the 70s shag. Still, if the sides are funny and provide some opportunity for some rich acting, I could be OK.

That's where the real bad news is. The scene is the three stars sitting around rehearsing lines. What? That's how we find the man who will embody the sex-farce sitcom slapstick king? Whatever. I read my nine lines. They went well, but I don't think I did enough to overcome the complete lack of resemblance to the character.


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