March 8, 2002
"First of all, how old are you?"
Let's be honest, if you were the right age, they wouldn't ask you. So at that point, you have three options:
Option one, tell the truth. Though honesty may be the best policy, it's probably not going to get you a job in this case. But are you banking for future opportunities? Will an honest answer here get you called in for the 33 year-old roles later? In general, I find there is very little successful "banking" in Hollywood. In many cases, you either get it or you don't. There are just too many actors and too many auditions for anyone to run a profitable banking operation. That leaves you with the lie options...
Option two, say you are older.
Option three, say you are younger.
Yesterday, during the With You in Spirit audition, I was asked the same question. I answered, "Thirty-th-- ...how old do you need me to be?" I had decided as my age was leaving my mouth that it might be to my advantage to lie, but I became stumped by which direction to go. This is the challenge of options two and three. I was left admitting that I was, in fact, 33.
Some days, however, like today, you have a good handle on which way to go. JAMES needed to be younger. So now what? Do I say I'm 32? Is that even worth it? 31? Until I leave the early-30s, it doesn't feel like I'm accomplishing anything. So, 30. How about that? It's a nice, round number, the dawn of a new decade. If I'm caught in my lie, I can argue that I said my whole age, they just didn't hear the "three" part at the end. And still, 30? If he is supposed to be in his twenties, then the number 30 alone is going to put them off.
So the 20s. Now you're in the decade you need, and the lie is at least a four-year lie, so why not shoot the moon? Do they want a 27 year-old guy? Say 27. A 23 year-old guy? Say 23. I went out for a drink last night and the bartender asked for my ID. Say 20. If the lighting is low enough, you can fool anybody. But a 29 year-old can usually play most ages in the 20s. Hell, Luke Perry played a 15 year-old. And saying 29 makes your lie the "smallest," and just in case there is some sort of lie-size cut-off for heaven, you want to be careful. And it's a classic. In the real world, everyone uses the last age of the previous decade when lying about their age. You would be in good company.
So...
"First of all, how old are you?"
"33."
"You gave a great reading, but you're just too old."